Living What They Know
By Sharon Egiebor
Too many children are living in households where marriage is uncommon and sexual abstinence is rarely considered an option. The children come from homes where their mother is the second, third or even fourth generation of households headed by single women. For these children, taking an abstinence only education program may not prevent premarital sex, but it may encourage them to form life goals, to stay in school and to delay their first pregnancy. “We have kids who never see anyone get married and who see sex and cohabitation as the norm. The first thing we do is to convince kids that marriage is possible, healthy and available for them,” said Jacqueline Del Rosario, executive director of ReCapturing The Vision. “Our program comprehensively teaches them to find a mate and that abstinence is about waiting to get married. If you’re able to change their mindset, it is a great milestone.” Over a 9-year span, students from the ReCapturing The Vision, based in Miami-Dade, Fla. School district, participated in a federally-sponsored study that looked at the value of abstinence only education. This was the first longitudinal study of abstinence only programs. Other agencies participating included My Choice, My Future! in Powhatan, Va.; Families United to Prevent Teen Pregnancy in Milwaukee; and Teens in Control in Clarksdale, Miss. Statistically, the children, who voluntarily took classes as early as the 6th grade, were no different than children who took comprehensive sex education that may have been offered in mandated classroom curriculum. About half of both sets of students reported remaining sexually abstinent, and a slightly higher proportion reporting having been abstinence during the 12 months before the study, conducted by Mathematica Policy Research Inc., based in Princeton, N.J. ReCapturing the Vision had the largest number of students who either remained abstinent or abstained from sex over the 12 months prior to the final study. Del Rosario said that slight difference is a result of the program’s positive impact on her students, many who are poor, Hispanic or African American girls living with single parents. Most of the students were between 18 and 20 years old when the study concluded. Mathematica released the report in four waves. The final study was released in April. Del Rosario said her agency keeps track of most of its former clients. One of her first students, identified as L.S., didn’t get pregnant until she was about 21 years old. L.S.’s mother had her when she was 15 and unwed. “We have to look at abstinence education holistically, When you see what the kids’ lives are like day in and day out and where they come from and what their perspective is, then you’re more able to see the successes.”
The abstinence lessons helped L.S. focus on getting her high school diploma, Del Rosario said.
“Abstinence only is an alternative message and whether they [students] choose to say no, is another issue. The real point of the message is that people first need to make the decision to do the right thing, and then understand that human nature may have them do the wrong thing,” she said. Del Rosario cited a study by Rebecca Maynard that showed girls given comprehensive sex education, condoms and contraceptives still got pregnant. Del Rosario said society is arguing unnecessarily about the values or lack of values of abstinence only education programs. “When someone tells me that a 12 year old shouldn’t have sex, I wonder what planet are they a from. Sex is a very adult activity. Who would say that a 12 year old should not be told to wait to find out about themselves, who they are, what is important, to find friends, to look for someone who is like yourself to share your views and morals. All of this information is wonderful for kids to learn and to get out of sticky situations. We don’t just teach them to avoid sex, but sex, drugs and violence. “That is a message I would never stop giving, whether Mathematica says it is scientific improvement or not. I walk the halls daily and know that the program works. The parents say they are kids are thriving.” Del Rosario said the youth in the program had better school attendance, an improvement in grades and fewer school suspensions. Del Rosario said she is concerned that too many children are bombarded by sexually explicit messages every day through television shows or music. “In the past, Jimmy and Jane have sex because it is puppy love,” she said. “If you work around youth on a daily basis, you would know how base human sexuality has come about with our youth. Sexual intercourse is a transaction now, defunct of a commitment and a relationship.” The Miami school district, like many around the country, is being confronted with the casual sex attitudes, teenagers sleeping with adults, experimentation in homosexuality and oral sex, she said. Del Rosario also said she worries that too many girls are at risk of being sexually molested, and too frequently by a boyfriend or friend of their young, single mother. Del Rosario calls it a symptom of the Single Mother Syndrome: “There are a host of problems you will find with single mothers. There is the intergenerational cycle of young motherhood who have never been married to anyone staple. They will get pregnant at 15 and they’ll have a daughter. The daughter will get pregnant at 16. It is a cycle that becomes more and more acute over time.”
Table 1. A-H Definition of Abstinence Education for Title V, Section 510 Programs
• A. Have as its exclusive purpose teaching the social, psychological, and health gains to be realized by abstaining from sexual activity. • B. Teach abstinence from sexual activity outside marriage as the expected standard for all school-age children. • C. Teach that abstinence from sexual activity is the only certain way to avoid out-of-wedlock pregnancy, sexually transmitted diseases, and other associated health problems. • D. Teach that a mutually faithful, monogamous relationship in the context of marriage is the expected standard of sexual activity. • E. Teach that sexual activity outside the context of marriage is likely to have harmful psychological and physical effects. • F. Teach that bearing children out of wedlock is likely to have harmful consequences for the child, the child’s parents and society. p>• G. Teach young people how to reject sexual advances and how alcohol and drug use increases vulnerability to sexual advances. • H. Teach the importance of attaining self-sufficiency before engaging in sexual activity. Source: Title V, Section 510 (b)(2)(A-H) of the Social Security Act (P.L. 104-193)